I've finally found something that takes my mind off the horrible customer service I get --- and that my readers complain to me about --- when I telephone almost any company I can name.

I'm often forced to listen to five or 10 minutes' worth of canned music before I reach a human. When I finally am able to ask my questions, the answers are usually lame.

But that sounds great to me now.

E-mail customer support, a growing trend, is even worse.

Obviously it is cheaper for a company to answer questions and complaints by e-mail rather than using the telephone. That way the workload is even. Rather than trying to answer a phone as it rings, the customer support workers can reply to e-mails as they have time. (I realize margins are short and companies are trying to save money as best they can.)

I am not a business genius. But it shouldn't take a Harvard MBA to realize that saving money by doing a poor job of answering questions from customers is shortsighted. You save big money, but I think you also risk losing big. It's a good way to lose a customer.

Maybe there is a way to do e-mail customer support right. If there is, I haven't bumped into any company that has figured it out.

I had firsthand experience with trying to get an answer by e-mail over the holidays.

I'm not talking about complicated questions. In one case, a gift certificate from Amazon did not arrive in a reasonable time. I had ordered a paper gift certificate rather than an e-mailed notification of the gift. When the certificate didn't arrive in seven days or so, I decided to call to ask about the order.

There's something comforting about being able to talk to a real human when you have a question. With e-mail (as you'll see), it's difficult to ask a follow-up question if the original answer isn't satisfactory.

Maybe there is a telephone number listed on the Amazon site. But if it is there, it isn't easy to find. So I sent an e-mail asking about the order. I received an answer telling me to wait for a few more days since holiday mail can be slow. That seemed reasonable enough.

The gift certificate still had not arrived after a few more days, so I wrote Amazon again. I said I really wanted a paper certificate for my gift, not an e-mail notification. I hoped the company would use an overnight service to send the certificate I wanted.

But the e-mail told me to furnish an e-mail address for my recipient.

After about three tries, I realized I was outgunned. It was easy to brush me off with e-mail.

It's not just Amazon. I have plenty of e-mail horror stories to tell. I mention Amazon by name because it has a reputation for good customer service. I still think it's a good company --- much better than most other Web businesses at dealing with its customers. That's the sad thing --- mediocre customer service ranks near the top of the list.

At least I got an answer from Amazon, even if it wasn't satisfactory.

During that same period, I wanted to ask another company for a refund. Just as was true with Amazon, I couldn't find a telephone number, so I was forced to use e-mail. Other than an automated reply saying my e-mail had been received, I never got a reply at all. I tried a couple more times before asking my credit card company to withhold payment.

It was the same when I wrote the publisher of a computer program asking a technical question. Despite repeated attempts to contact the company by e-mail, I never received a response at all.

Say what you will about telephone customer support. It can be frustrating waiting on hold. Often the responses are ill-informed or unsatisfactory. But at the very least you're free to try to beg and plead for better help in person.

E-mail customer support adds a new level of helplessness.

So what can be done about this? My guess is that if you write an e-mail complaining about e-mail customer support, you'll get a polite note explaining its virtues from good companies. The bad companies won't answer at all.

But if you're as fed up as I am about the trend toward e-mail customer support, there are things that can be done.

While a single complaint may go unnoticed, thousands of them may make a dent in even the thickest head. A lot of people read this column. That gives you more clout than you may realize.

So, if you find yourself in the same boat --- trapped in e-mail hell --- then don't be shy about letting a company know how you feel. I'm not talking about sending an e-mail. Instead, send an old-fashioned letter.

Often you'll be able to navigate through a corporate Web site to areas where there's a mailing address. I'm talking about a street or post office box address. Good places to look are toward the bottom of the main Web page labeled "about us" or even "job opportunities."

If that fails, look for a section called "investor relations" --- you'll often find telephone numbers and addresses there.

Then there's www.hoovers.com. Go to that site and type the name of the company in the search box, and you'll get a mailing address and phone number.

Sure, you'll have to go to a little trouble to complain. So start your letter by mentioning that you are upset enough to go to some trouble.

Be polite, but remind the company that --- if it went to a little trouble on your behalf --- that wouldn't have been necessary.

tecbud@ajc.com